Thursday, March 07, 2013

Third Fool From the Left

Ethon was looking hungry yesterday.  Eli asked him (cautiously and from a distance) what was up.  Turns out that he took a moving contract from Scrotum, to deliver Chris Monckton around the world where he could advance Mycroft's Agenda 21.  As the bunnies may recall, Joe Bast and the Heartland Mob had finally cottoned onto Chis' unwitting, but effective, role in the UN plan to subjugated the world.  Being from Chicago, and well funded by  Bankroll Barry, they had sent some associates to London to terminate the annoyance.

Fortunately, Mycroft had gotten a message from Peter Gleick (the matter having been discussed at the Heartland board meeting last winter, one of the memos held close) and was able to take measures to spirit Chris to safety and a world wide lecture tour, keeping one step ahead of the competition.

Unfortunately, there had been no time to commission a transportation module from W&H Giddon, Saddlers and they had to make do with what Scrotum could scare up at the Extreme Restraints Bondage store deep in the East End.

There were chafing consequences accounting for several pictures taken recently

Eli kept adding pins to the map as Ethon flew Monckton from Scotland, to Rio to Qatar to the Antipodes, assuming that the bird was being well fed and was quite surprised by the rather thin appearance of his friend.   The scam doesn't work anymore Eli, Ethon sadly told him.

Monckton is discovering that you can't get to the edge of crazy, there is always someone a bit further out than you.  Supporting a globe trotting lifestyle, a hunting lodge here and there, and the tailor is an expensive business and Chris has had trying times as funding for his main gig, denial of climate change, dries up.  Scrotum has been furloughed and is looking for work in Washington, it is so bad.  His Lordship has been trying birtherism, snake oil cures for everything from HIV to Graves disease, getting a gig in the House of Lords.  Poor lad, he got tossed out of a crazy Brit right wing party for being  "semi detached"


Well Ethon, Eli replied, surely, somebunnies, somewhere, maybe at the ends of the earth have a need for more Monckton.  Sadly, yes, said Ethon, but they don't pay very well;)


8 comments:

Russell Seitz said...

That ain't Brooks's stationary- instead of the club's belted logo, it's headed with Monckton's bogus Parliamentary portculis.

Since the court of St .James's has already formally admonished him to desist from such lese' majeste, the wayward viscount seems overdue for a scolding by Brooks's , and is unlikely to make the grade at White's if he keeps up his fair imitation of Screaming Lord Such.

Russell Seitz said...

Herewith is a link ( at_ letter_) to the missive from Monckton demanding the scalp of the devilish Tasmanian who called him a cherrypicker for averring no warming has occured " for the past 16, 18, 19 and 23 years" , while omitting mention of years 17 & 20-22 !

bill said...

Being a resident of the warrens of the Antipodes I see no need for him here - if no-one else wants him perhaps the UN can adopt him as a displaced person? Seems apt...

Anonymous said...

Monckton's obviously never met Tony, or he'd know that Tony is a gentleman of far greater calibre than Monckton himself evidences. If there were justice in the universe Monckton's title would be stripped and given to Tony for real and tangible services rendered, although the antipodean colonies foreswore that type of anachronism decades ago.

I hope that the UTAS response is firm and vociferous in defense of Tony Press. Given the almost embarrassing surfeit of world-class climatological talent in the institution there's no excuse for not getting a comprehensive and detailed assessment of the laudable integrity of Press, and the mendacious and indeed vexatious attempt by Monckton to misuse the University's for his own ends.

Frankly, I hope that the University waits out the month, and forces Monckton's hand on his professed intent to litigate. I'd like to see Mr Monckton's backside whipped in that department too, before the handing down of an appropriately scathing response to the Viscantcount's puerile tantrum.


Loud Bernard J. Hyphen-Anonymous XVII, Esq., of Benchpress.

Anonymous said...

Monckton's obviously never met Tony, or he'd know that Tony is a gentleman of far greater calibre than Monckton himself evidences. If there were justice in the universe Monckton's title would be stripped and given to Tony for real and tangible services rendered, although the antipodean colonies foreswore that type of anachronism decades ago.

I hope that the UTAS response is firm and vociferous in defense of Tony Press. Given the almost embarrassing surfeit of world-class climatological talent in the institution there's no excuse for not getting a comprehensive and detailed assessment of the laudable integrity of Press, and the mendacious and indeed vexatious attempt by Monckton to misuse the University's for his own ends.

Frankly, I hope that the University waits out the month, and forces Monckton's hand on his professed intent to litigate. I'd like to see Mr Monckton's backside whipped in that department too, before the handing down of an appropriately scathing response to the Viscantcount's puerile tantrum.


Loud Bernard J. Hyphen-Anonymous XVII, Esq., of Benchpress.

Anonymous said...

Ha! You may think that I had an error message returned the first time I posted, but in fact the doubling was deliberate.

If one looks at my two posts in the correct manner, they will appear to be 3-dimensional...


Loud Bernard J. Hyphen-Anonymous XVII, Esq., of Benchpress.

Anonymous said...

...to misuse the University's procedures...


Loud Bernard, etc. etc. ...


[Amusingly, Recaptcha says "Noblick 7159"]

MikeH said...

This appears to be on topic.

Climate change in Queensland is resulting in a shortage of scrotums.

http://www.watoday.com.au/environment/weather/brisbanes-bucketing-makes-it-hard-to-get-hold-of-the-scrotums-20130312-2fxor.html