Saturday, November 23, 2013

Eli Has A Journal To Sell You

The Lads from Lagos have pretty well exhausted the sum total of suckers for advanced fee fraud, you know the one where you get a letter, like Eli did

Attn Eli Rabett
8/11/05 6:31 AM

TEL-00228-920 66 79

                                  JOINT VENTURE PROPOSAL
                                LEGAL ATTORNEY & SOLICITOR
I am Barrister DC Ugoh, a solicitor. Am the personal attorney to  late Mr.JB Rabett,A national of your country,who used to Work with Shell Petroleum Company [West Africa] Togo and Rep of Benin Branch here in after shall be referred to as my client. In 2003, my client, his wife and their two children were involved in a plane crash in a village called Adjarra near Porto Novou after take off from Cotonou in Benin Republic.
It was unfortunate that my client and his family all lost their lives in the crash.For more on the plane crash log on to 

Since then I have made several enquiries in Cotonou, Lome-Togo and Porto Novou to locate any of my clients extended relatives, this has also proved unsuccessful. After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to track search with his last name to locate any member of his family hence I contacted you.I have contacted you to assist in repatriating the money and property left behind by my client before they get confiscated, frozen or declared unserviceable by the bank where these huge deposits were lodged.

Particularly where the deceased had an account valued at about $10.5 Million United States Dollars Only (Ten Million , Five Hundered Thousand United States Dollars Only) .. The Management has issued me a notice to provide the next Of kin or have the account frozen within the next twenty one Official working days. Since I have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for over 2 years now i seek your consent to present you as the next of kin of the deceased since you have the same last name so that the proceeds of this account valued at USD10.5M can be paid to you and both of us will share the money. I have all the necessary legal documents that can be used to back up any claim we may make.

And this I must do to make sure that this fund is not Wasted or end up in the wrong hands. All I require is your honesty , co-operation to enable us see this transaction through. I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law. I am waiting your urgent reply.Please you can reach me through this Telephone number :or my private email address.
Thanks for your understanding,

N/B : Please kindly call me as soon as you have sent me an email:00228 920 66 79.

Yours truly
Barrister DC Ugoh (ESQ)
Alternative email address
to which Eli's representative replied on his behalf
Barrister DC Ugoh,
As attorney for Mr. Eli Rabett, I have already claimed the money for Mr. Rabett and we do not propose sharing ANY of it with a charlatan like you!!

Very truly yours,

Ms. Nana Bozho Rabett, Managing Partner
Dewey, Cheatham and Howe, LLC 
 While there are suckers, there are also those who like to play with the wanna be suckees, and they play at the Onion of blogs, Scam o Rama
This site is devoted to the '419' scam - named after Section 419 of the Nigerian Criminal Code. Most '419' e-mails come from West Africa, chiefly Nigeria, or Nigerian expatriates (who happily scam other Nigerians). Although 419ers have their own style, their emails, which smack of political satire, contain elements harking back to 19th century European literature.
Yes, it's a crime, but the letters are funny. Read them out loud at parties and see. So are the responses. 
[Some people write back just to waste the scammers' time. That is scambaiting, and the raison d'être for Scamorama.]
Eli and his friend John Mashey have always been a fan of limited review journals such as JPANDS and the Journal of Scientific Exploration but somewhat of a favorable disposition towards open access journals, aka the vanity press.  While there are opportunities for funny business it is important to differentiate between open access publishers and those who want open access to financial documents.  Starting a year or two ago bunnies in the STEM business have received an increasing number of Emails offering opportunities to submit their excellent thoughts.

Well, business has been slow as the supply of suckers shrinks,  and the Scam o Rama folks have discovered the explosion of new scientific conferences and journals.  Say what you will, they are both funnier and have less of a not very hidden agenda than Nature Magazine, and a much lighter touch.

Lonslo Tossov shows how it is done
Date: Mon, 9 Sep 2013
Dear Sir
We wish to submit the results we have lately obtained on dilithium crystal resurgence and Mesocricetus auratus circular designed mobillty units within a flux capacitor model. They have proved very exciting and we have high hopes for commercial exploitation once any issues with possible human fatalites are ironed out.
Do you accept entries from South Africa?
Dr Lonslo Tossov
Tossov Laboratories & Sciences
1 Yanker Ave,
123 Via Costeira - Natal
Phone/Fax: 44 (0)906 517 4050
The abstract for the attached paper
Ilichy Miracsky, DRP, ASSC.
Emeritus Research Fellow of Smegaroon
University and Technical College, assisted by Fergus Paltrooon FRIP, Bart sc.
On Mesocricetus auratus circular designed mobillty units within a flux capacitor model
Investigation of primary motability units within dilithium limits.
(Initial invesigation of vestigial movements)
Aranged prism experiment, with selection of rodenta. The refractive index of a Mesocricetus auratus mobility unit depends on the incident velocity of light outside the prism and its velocity inside the prism after refraction. On Fresnel s fixed ether hypothesis, the incident light waves are situated in the stationary ether outside the prism and move with velocity c with respect to the ether. If the prism moves with a velocity u with respect to this fixed ether, then the incident velocity of light with respect to the prism should be C + H. Thus the refractive index of the glass prism should depend on , the absolute velocity of the prism, i.e., its velocity with respect to the fixed ether. Arago performed the experiment in 1819, but failed to detect the expected change
The paper itself "heavily" quoted, e.g. directly copied Einstein's 1913 paper on relativity. but after a suitable interchange there were some questions
Many thanks for getting back to us so promptly. What is the publication charge? Will we need to send any Mesocricetus auratus circular mobility units along with the submission for practical assessment? To be honest I will glad to see the back of them, they are always on the go and we need the room. The squeaking is intolerable after a while.
There is more at Scam o Rama, and the possibility of more to come remains.


Anonymous said...

Thanks for the chuckle Eli. The issue of the looseness afflicting vanity publication is very topical at work (it's frustrating and embarrassing that apparently intelligent postgrads and academics seem to be gullible to the latter...) and this will have a few of my colleagues grinning.

This reminds me of a question (tangentially-related only) I asked a little while back. I thought that it was Carbon dioxide production by benthic bacteria: the death of manmade global warming theory? (see here) that had Catweazle listed as an author in the reference section, but on digging I realised that it wasn't this effort that had done so. Does anyone know which hoax paper had said Saxon magician so listed?

Bernard J.

Susan Anderson said...

chortle, chuckle, giggle ... good value at Rabett's.

However, I note an increase in topical spam in my inbox, and would warn kindhearted people to be wary. Environment and politics are big business and scammers have taken note. There's one that joins the chorus of solar sales (an admirable effort, so too bad it's being diluted).

Fergus Brown said...

How did you discover my middle name?

ligne said...

Bernard: it was that paper, they just spelled it viß ein Cherman tschvizt:

Rosetti, CG and EW Hirsch (1966). Linear reciprocity of the Kattweizel- Gruhe Cycle in multi - and uni-cellular eukaryotes. Nature 166:11. 1523- 1547.