Friday, February 02, 2007

An early valentine for the Stoat

The grumpy young Stoat thinks that today's IPCC SPM was unexciting. The Independent has something completely over the top for him. If you are looking for something reasonable try Real Climate, but for something describing another planet we do have the Indy for you.....

+6.4°: Most of life is exterminated

Warming seas lead to the possible release of methane hydrates trapped in sub-oceanic sediments: methane fireballs tear across the sky, causing further warming. The oceans lose their oxygen and turn stagnant, releasing poisonous hydrogen sulphide gas and destroying the ozone layer. Deserts extend almost to the Arctic. "Hypercanes" (hurricanes of unimaginable ferocity) circumnavigate the globe, causing flash floods which strip the land of soil. Humanity reduced to a few survivors eking out a living in polar refuges. Most of life on Earth has been snuffed out, as temperatures rise higher than for hundreds of millions of years.

What happens at lower temps is also no picnic, at least according to the Indi

+3.4°: Rainforest turns to desert

The Amazonian rainforest burns in a firestorm of catastrophic ferocity, covering South America with ash and smoke. Once the smoke clears, the interior of Brazil has become desert, and huge amounts of extra carbon have entered the atmosphere, further boosting global warming. The entire Arctic ice-cap disappears in the summer months, leaving the North Pole ice-free for the first time in 3 million years. Polar bears, walruses and ringed seals all go extinct. Water supplies run short in California as the Sierra Nevada snowpack melts away. Tens of millions are displaced as the Kalahari desert expands across southern Africa

Couldn't make it up if you tried. Makes the Guardian seem reasonable.

UPDATE: Visitors from Adam Smith, welcome and feel free to check your climate bingo cards for a winner.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sounds like something out of Dante's Inferno... or the "End Times".

Are you Rapture Ready?

Do you have all of your carrots in a neat little row?

I certainly hope so, because it sounds like the nonbeliever rabbits (and their carrots) will be stew.

Anonymous said...

Please specify whether you are posting temperatures in units of F, C, K, or R.

William M. Connolley said...

Oh no, we're all going to die :-(

Beuatiful day here today: glorious blue skies and delightfulo warmth. Though there was the first overnight frost for ages.

Anonymous said...

I just skimmed hrough the IPCC report, and I don't see anythingof the sort.

Am I blind or is the Independent getting somehting noopne else is?

sam-hec

Anonymous said...

The independent also thinks people who drive SUV's are just as bad as suicide bombers. The difference being that it just take longer to kill with the CO2 from a SUV...
They are continuously over the top on this topic.

Anonymous said...

Let that vehicle run in the garage and close the door, and the end result is as good as a suicide bomber's.

Yet remove it from the garage and it's, "Look Ma my PC stupidity says it's okay to pump poisonous and deadly gases into the atmosphere, cause it's whole lot bigger now."

Anonymous said...

Yeah, you're right. Driving a car is just as bad as blowing up some innocent people. Please...

Khebab said...

are there any scientific articles backing up those claims?