Blue Rabett or as the toilet twirls
In which the bunnies learn why physics is always less useful than plumbing. On her way out the door this morning, Ms. Rabett muttered, the toilet isn't working, that's your job. So Eli did the manly thing and went and bought about a hundred bucks worth of tools, observed that the toilet not only didn't flush down, but also needed a complete gut replacement, went back to the hardware store, bought a complete set of innards, stopped by the bookstore to get a book on useful expletives for when nothing works and took the damn thing apart getting the blue stuff all over himself and the floor, that book came in useful, and we learned that contrary to rumor brass screws used in toilets do corrode so you have to go back to the hardware store and get WD-40 and when that doesn't work you go back yet again and get a nut cracker (nononono, not that kind).
Put it back together and it still didn't flush (we won't talk about running, that's another project), so apart and together it went again, but clearly water was not filling the bowl quickly enough, so Eli went upstairs and looked at the working toilet in the house. Being a scientist and all, Eli observed that the water in the upstairs toilet circled clockwise when flushed and the downstairs one circled couterclockwise. As a well trained physicist Eli occasionally believed that this was all due to Coriolus forces, so he concluded that the upstairs toilet was in heaven, and the downstairs one in hell, or Australia, and we know that nothing works there because of the Howard government which, like the toilet, soon will be replaced.
Still, it was clear that closer inspection was called for and the Rabett
bent over, assumed the position and observed the brown underrim. Folks, Eli's shit may not stink, but it does stick, so the bunnies gloved him up and away we scrubbed and stuck pointy things into the holes which brings us to the point of this diatribe. If you bend down and feel around the bottom rim of your toilet you will find a bunch of little holes and one big one. When you flush, the water is forced into the rim and through the jets into the bowl. The big one is aimed slightly to one side or the other of the standing water in the bowl, which is what causes it to rotate rapidly. If you actually looked when you flushed you would see this jet of water cross the bowl and twirl the water. The direction of the big jet determines clockwise or counterclockwise. The other jets wash down the surface and rapidly build the volume until siphonic action strikes. Your crapper at work.


